My first in the series of recordings from live interviews on my Small Business Matter with The Content Quarter facebook group.
Today I talk to Satu from Northern Light Coaching, about confidence in business, where it comes from, why we have it and most importantly, how not to let it stop you achieving.
Watch the video below or read the transcript..
Speaker 1: (00:05)
Well, hello everyone. It's me, Vicky, your content coach. And welcome to my excellent podcast series. Grow your business. I hope that you find it inspiring. And please remember to subscribe while you're here so that you don't miss out on any useful advice of business knowledge. And you can also follow me in all the major socials, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn
Speaker 2: (00:38)
Today's episode is a recording of a live interview that I did with SATU from Northern Lake coaching on my small business matters Facebook group. Please do feel free to join the group. If you simply search for small business matters with the content quarter over on Facebook, I'd love to see you there. Let's find out what that entails. I'm going to bring SATU on. Now. This is SATU from Northern lights coaching. Good morning tattoo. Good morning.
Speaker 3: (01:03)
I love your green room.
Speaker 2: (01:06)
Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, I just, um, I needed a pop of color, you know, everything else else in the house is kind of white and Ikea, which is great because it's very calming. But in here I needed a, you know, exciting sort of color. So yeah, off, I set with it with the paint roller
Speaker 3: (01:27)
And that's what we do. Don't we, we paint our reality. That's what I do all the time. And you do all the time. Absolutely. So this morning, I'm all right. To assume that we're going to talk about the confidence, right?
Speaker 2: (01:43)
That's right. Yeah. Apparently you, so you've got a little sort of thing that you're going to do with me. I don't quite know what that entails, um, to, to everyone watching. I would love for you to sort of join along with this. Maybe put this into practice a little bit later, whatever SATU does, but I'm, I'm sure if nothing else you're leaving, just enjoy listening to Satie's amazingly calming, lovely voice. So
Speaker 3: (02:08)
Thank you. Well, the reason why I asked you to think of something that we can work on is to really give an opportunity to all the, all the guy everybody to join into. There is this thing that the coaching in the coaching world, people say that when someone is getting coached, the whole room gets coached. Because when you see how, when you hear the storyline, you hear what the people are saying. You hear the questions that are asked, we cannot pass, actually process them in. What does that mean to me? How does that manifest in my life? In this way? It's going to be much more fun for everyone to upset. It's going to be much more useful because you're going to get benefit out of this test. And you're not Guinea pig. You receive a wonderful opportunity to sort some tiny little thing out a little ago, something you would have thought it's like in the blue pita, you have prepared something before.
Speaker 3: (03:14)
Here's what I made earlier. Exactly. And the first step always the first step that I do is the thing, what's the meaning of anything really? And with us now, what is the meaning of confidence? Well, what's the purpose of confidence? What do we use it for? What do we need? Or where do we get it from? Can you go and buy it? Can you lose it? Can you leave it to the bus stop? What is it? And what do we do with it? But do we need it? And when we start these questions, it starts to bring more out of that word because you see, we conceptualized, we define the weld, we color it with our mind and thoughts. And sometimes redefining something opens up a little bit more space that is really helpful for us in that moment. So confidence, I think often I do this too, I think often, and I know this goes across the language barriers because I speak many, well many, three or four, but when you're born in a very, very small country, you're going to have to learn to speak other languages if you want to go out to the world.
Speaker 3: (04:47)
So it's fine, but it is universal. It's not sincere. It's not just me. It's not just Newcastle England. It's worldwide. We tend to believe that we need confidence to start doing something new. I don't have a confidence to do that. I would really like to do that, but I just don't feel confident enough to do that. That's really quite common, I think. And what actually happens there inside of our mind and bodies that our brain defines what we know as safe when we are going to do something that we haven't done before of a brain cause [inaudible] mode.
Speaker 3: (05:39)
And that's when we say, Oh, it's out of my comfort zone. I'm not confident enough to do that. But only thing that feeling actually is, is your sensory awareness that your body has gone to your mirror cat mode that is really useful and kept our ancestors alive all those years ago, with that, when they were named in that they had saber-tooth tigers in the neighborhood. It was quite good idea to be on your tippy toes when you're in a different place that is near. So we tend to think that that somehow relates to all the confidence and ability to start something new. Whereas in actual fact, that feeling is test us, embracing ourselves, to see if there is something dangerous. That doesn't mean that that is dangerous. So then now if you fall, if you can't follow my story, I hope you have arrived to the moment where we reveal, Oh, so what do we need confidence then for what is it? What do we need? Confidence? How do we learn new things? How do we do new things? Do you ride a bike? Huh? I do. Yes. Great.
Speaker 2: (07:10)
Well, I haven't done in quite some time, but yes I can.
Speaker 3: (07:13)
I love that. And would I be right assuming that there was a time in your life when you couldn't ride a bike?
Speaker 2: (07:21)
Uh, definitely. Yeah, so I wasn't born ready to ride a bike. You know, I think I was about four, four years old or something really.
Speaker 3: (07:31)
And when you were four year old, the first time when you put your leg over that saddle and you sat on it, you couldn't have had confidence to be a bike rider because you've never done it.
Speaker 2: (07:51)
Yeah. Well, you start off with the training wheels, don't you, you, you, you, you, you go up and down and um, and, and then one day I, in fact, I remember it distinctly, my mum, I, I wanted to, she only let us play in the front street. And uh, I said, I wanted to go round rammed into the back lane with, with the big kids. And she said, well, only if you learn how to ride on two wheels, Vicki here. So that was the incentive I had to.
Speaker 3: (08:20)
I love it. I love it. I love it. And this is the thing as well. I had to. So I'm going to park here a little bit and talk to the gang. I would like, I would like all of you to take this moment to think of something that might have been your goal. We'd like, like, you know, in a, in quite like in this moment, like one of my goals is to walk and hike to the base camp of Kilimanjaro. I wouldn't use it now because it's unlikely that I will be working for it. But if you have something in a more immediate present life, immediate future, I would like everybody. This is kind of think of something that you had wanted to do. I mean, I know I have things I have wanted to look at my website this week. I could get into your, your goals, but something inside of me kept me behind and held on me because I was [inaudible] and Vicky has prepared something earlier from home. So what is it? Can you tell me a little bit about it? You don't have to reveal your deep secrets. I'm sure you can keep you safe, but what are we working on yesterday?
Speaker 2: (09:45)
You asked me to think of a little something. You gave me a little bit of advanced warning, but I wasn't quite sure what you were going to do with it or what the context was, but I think it would be useful for everyone in the group as well to maybe think of something that they want to do in business, but something's holding them back for some reason. Um, but for, for me, um, something that's, it's not holding me back as such because I'm quite sort of bold and brave, and I just do what I want most of the time. So, um, but, um, there's something that sort of, um, perhaps not letting me reach my potential with some thing. Um, yeah. And, and, and it's, it's not because I'm scared as such as I guess, cause it's more of an unknown. Um, and I guess that's cause I run three businesses are in this one.
Speaker 2: (10:32)
I run my floral business as you know, and I run the third one, which is my online shop called Urbana. And, um, that is quite a new thing for me. Um, although I've run businesses for almost 10 years now. And even as when I had my retail shopping in the flower world, I had an online shop associated with it, but this is the first time that I've run something like a shop that is purely online. It has no retail outlet. It, it has no, uh, you know, anything it's, it's its own entity. So it's a real learning curve for me. And whilst I've had the website for months, um, I've been too busy to do anything with it. Um, so it's only like, um, this past couple of maybe two to three weeks that I've really, really plowed into it and develop the website and got it ready for an actual launch.
Speaker 2: (11:23)
So at a stage where I can feel proud of it. Um, so in terms of things that hold me back, it's the, it's the sales I, um, I'm thinking, you know, in my head, Oh, well, you know, I've, I've got this Christmas launch. If I can reach January with a handful of sales, you know, get me off the starting block, I'll be happy. You know, I'll be happy to just learn something along the way and see, you know, so which even actually, even as I'm saying that I tell my clients the opposite to that. I would be saying, come on, no, set yourself a goal him, Hey, reach that girl, which sucks. That's crazy that I'm saying that to myself. So I guess yes, to answer your question, that that's what, um, I felt was sort of holding me back. I've got that in my mindset that a handful of sales will be okay.
Speaker 3: (12:11)
Yeah. Hannah, that sounds like a song from that. Um, a musical handful of sales, small blushes, and that's what it is, isn't it, there is a belief and we all have it. Reality is based on our beliefs and our beliefs are exactly that they are beliefs not to believe some populates, all that we believe believes. And what it is is we caution it. That handful of sales is a quiet, nice caution. Isn't it. If you believe that there is just a handful of sales and we caution it with that, then we can learn from it. And it's a nice experience as well. We love making, maybe we make it, we sort of manifesting it. Some people would say, yeah. So first thing to do is because this is quite broad though, isn't it it's very practical yet. It's quite broad. So what I, what I found it helpful in my life and in, in, in many of my clients like to is before we go to the insight for leaves, let's see what we can do to in a concrete reality here, which we also create in our minds, but never mind.
Speaker 3: (13:49)
January seems quite far. It's still November, not very long, but it's still November. Yes. And so loads of stuff is going to happen. Lots of moments, loads of interactions, interactions that have nothing to do with you, lots of life is going to fit between this moment and January. So I'm going to invite you to, Oh, where did I put my hand so I can show it in the camera. Can I invite you to bring it a little bit closer? Because at the moment you think about your goal being in January and it's quite arbitrary still. So if you wanted to have handful of sales in January, what aspects can you change in this girl? Can you bring it closer and can you make handful to something else?
Speaker 2: (14:49)
Yeah. Um, yeah, I mean, I guess, um, even just shortening that time skill would possibly help actually. Um, if I can make those sales in the next two weeks, you know, that then I would be happy. Um, so, so yeah, I guess, I guess just practical steps such as, you know, um, maybe even just pushing it on social media, you know, um, I could do a push on social media over the next few days and then, you know, there's lots of online, Christmas markets are on Facebook groups and stuff nowadays. So I could, I could push that, you know, and just, just join groups like that. And, um, you know, I've got Google ads on the go and things like that. So, so just, um, just, just making that push in a shorter timescale, I think would, would possibly help. Yeah.
Speaker 3: (15:45)
Great. So I think this is a great start. So what we do is we're going to bring it from January to two weeks time. Where are you in two weeks time? Think about any I had, but where are you? Is it like beginning of December, mid December? Um, I don't know,
Speaker 2: (16:08)
Actually, I've, I've got my, my digital marketing exam on the 14th. So, um, so I'm thinking before that, before that, um, so I can, you know, do a bit of revision a few days before hand and stuff. So I would love to sort of see some, some sort of progress. Um, I've also got an influencer booked in, on the, on the 9th of December. So she's going to sort of showcase some of the products and, and, and stuff. So, um, so yeah, that, that will hopefully help.
Speaker 3: (16:39)
I love that I'm going to park it here for a very little while. It's just point out to everybody who is listening, that what happened here was that Vicki product, obviously, you know, she brought it closer in a shorter timescale, but also not as time, because time is the most abstract thing that there is in the world. It's not actually within our reality, but when we tie our goals into actually our personal timeline, it starts to become more real. So the goal that has been living inside of our mind actually can have a start and begin manifest itself in the real world where our actions happen inside Israel too. However, that sounds really great. So one other thing, the next step from you look at the goal as a confidence is, is that so far before if something happened there and I don't know if you noticed, but your goal was for you to make sales handful who say that's a great goal, but that doesn't actually, you don't have a power for that because there's loads of people who make that decision. So it's quite good because then that becomes a wish and a dream. And then all this confidence starts to float. If you make your goal or something that you can actually hand 100% govern, they give it all your power that you have. And I know you have that a lot
Speaker 2: (18:28)
Speaker 3: (18:32)
If you make this goal within this moment now into completely governed by you, because all those things that started to come from what you were saying, they were your actions, not someone else buying because we can't control other people, but your actions, you can fulfill your goals. You've got quite great things that are coming out from that about you.
Speaker 2: (19:01)
I guess I'm sort of it's for me, even just going through this process of talking about it as seen, made it seem, um, a bit more real, a bit less daunting it's um, it's, it's turned it from this pipe dream. You gone Saturday, or there you go. Um, it's turned it into this pipe from this pipe dream thing and a very vague, um, sort of, you know, goal. It wasn't even a goal really, um, into sort of practical steps, you know, uh, I'm sort of thinking already in my head over the next few days, I'm going to give it a push. Um, I mean, I'm part of a virtual, uh, Christmas market tonight on, on, um, the virtual Christmas market, Facebook group, I think it's called. Um, so everybody feel free to join that group because there'll be some good things going on. Um, so, so I'm doing that tonight.
Speaker 2: (19:55)
So I'm already making a conscious sort of effort of thinking, right? Well, I'm going to really get involved in that and comment and share and like, and things like that. Um, and then I'm also thinking right in my head or okay, over the next week or so I'm going to maybe schedule some, some posts on social media and showcase some of the products or, or get more of the products on the Instagram shop and, and things like that. So, so, um, I'm already, it's not a, it's not this big sort of pie in the sky sort of thing. It's, it's, uh, it's manageable chunks. It's practical, manageable, manageable chunks, isn't it?
Speaker 3: (20:34)
Absolutely. And sorry about that. My mother-in-law rang me and my phone,
Speaker 2: (20:39)
But why not? Um, well this, the thing,
Speaker 3: (20:49)
When we go to big, big girls, the confidence and our, our definition of confidence starts to come and play. So now I'm delighted, you have a really doable goal. And another coach that talks about doing impossible, because I don't want to wake up in the morning and say, I'm going to do the impossible. I want to do doable. And I know that a great battle cry. I'm going to be beautiful today, but that's the way how we do things. We do do a of things and do things, create these amazing masterpieces. And when you do your story and when you get your face and your story and your energy to your Urbana, that's how we works. And there's no January. There's no handful of sales in the, in the Oliver. Oliver has been in my mind now and confidence. What I would like to leave everybody with this thought about confidence is that don't wait for the confidence to start. You really don't need confidence to put your leg over your saddle and sit on it because you couldn't have had confidence when he started to ride a bike and you, and it didn't even feel nice. It doesn't have to be nice for you to start something new. I mean, I remember the summer of hell of it, my green bike. It wasn't nice. It was horrible, but I wanted to do it because I had to do it because I wanted to do it. So I could ride a bike and go out with my mates.
Speaker 3: (22:49)
So this is with your business. It's your play, it's your game. You want to do this because you want to go forward. You want to go and play with your mates and the world and the clients and your colleagues and everything. So get over that with your mum, that saddle. And don't wait for the confidence to arrive, because what you need is courage. You needed courage to take the time. It's courage. It starts with the same letter. So it's quite easy to walk. And I like this metaphor. Do you like food? I do. As you can tell, I love food too. And I'm thinking that many of our group likes food too. So I'm going to prepare this metaphor for you. Don't wait for confidence as a starter because you'll never get fed. You're never get your meal because it's a side on, it's an effect. Confidence comes like when you were riding your bike, your confidence group grows from doing so if you sit on your table and you think I need to have a confidence first. Yeah. Because it's decided on. So how do you start as a courage, sit your bum on your saddle and peddling a doable thing today and this week. And I'd like us to make a little game. You like games, VR games,
Speaker 2: (24:43)
Speaker 3: (24:43)
You have now told everybody about you order the thing and you compressed it and made it a doable thing. I was sealing.
Speaker 2: (24:53)
I have to go the Fest that I have been scared of. The C E O S S E O S. And, uh, uh, you know, challenge. Yeah.
Speaker 3: (25:01)
So I'm going to do it. I'm going to go back and I'm going to watch these lives and I'm going to do it and catch up. I'm going to invite everybody who is watching that, do it, because it's just creates a little bit space in your mind because these things that we keep manifesting inside of our minds, they kind of grow. And can't be,
Speaker 2: (25:25)
That's a very good point that they do don't they that's. Um, but yet, you know what, I absolutely, I love this, this metaphor, this, this thing of, um, the, you know, the, the courage first actually, because yeah, I mean, when you first started riding a bike, you weren't confident, you know, you're just, uh, like you say, it's, it's courage. It's not confidence. I've never thought of the two things as being separate before. Um, I've not even thought of my, my, my thing with my online shop as being a confidence issue until we talked about this today, uh, to be honest, but then when I look at it objectively now, what, what else could it be? It's if I need to be confident, whether I need to practice what I preach and tell other people and do what I tell other people to do, I need to just be confident in and start doing. And then, you know, th the, the confidence comes after that. After I've made millions of sales on this
Speaker 3: (26:29)
That's right. Darling, courageous, Vicky, Vicky, the crazy good courageous instead of Vicky, the content coach, again, it's the same letter, Vicky. The courageous
Speaker 2: (26:40)
Is that along the, there to Vicky, they're courageous.
Speaker 3: (26:47)
I hope this was useful for you. I hope everybody. I hope you got a chance to, uh, have your thing and bring it along. And if you didn't then do it, do it now, and think if there's something in your mind, bring it out, make it doable. It's a great battle cry.
Speaker 2: (27:07)
Oh, I love that setting. No, this has been great. Thank you. Thank you. This is like a perfect end to confidence week. Uh, so, uh, really appreciate you coming along, um, to everyone watching, um, SATU has a Facebook page called Northern light coaching. Um, she also has, um, a couple of great groups, um, mindful months with the Northern lights. Um, and she has a subscription in a light as well. Don't you? Yes. Um, I follow all the groups. Uh so-so yes. It's just, she's she's got all the thoughts going on online, so please feel free to follow up. Um, and you get to listen to our lovely calming voice all the time then. Brilliant. Um, so yeah, uh, just seen a couple of, uh, a couple of comments there. Um, so yeah, if Vicky says, um, yes, that would be great. I've missed Stephanie to catch up. So, yeah, so yeah, the, um, what I'm going to do for everyone with regards to the online visibility challenge now is to get something typed up for you to do, just to list all the steps. So you can all catch up a little bit, even if you're referred to it in the future, and you can just, um, you know, go through it and that'll help you set too as well onto it.
Speaker 3: (28:22)
Okay. Can I do something really cheeky for the charity's sake?
Speaker 2: (28:26)
Oh, come on, go on, then go on them. You've been so lovely.
Speaker 3: (28:29)
Thank you. What it is is that, uh, my boys, I have two boys and they have organized a charity event to stew days ago. Yes. So they are the project managers and I am going to have to get the donations. So this is why I, um, woman on the mission. Uh, we are, they are collecting money to buy food to the West end food bank, and I'm giving them to my online Christmas calendar that gives positive mood States to keep ourselves grounded for this December that is going to behave at the moment outside.